Do you have a horse that is disobedient? Or one the tries to get out of work? One that is disrespectful or stubborn?   Is your horse a jerk sometimes? It is normal and natural to think of your horse this way, but if you answered "yes" to any of these questions, your attitude is actually a big part of the problem!

As humans, we tend to focus on problems rather than solutions. When you look at something as a problem, you get confrontational with your horse then the two of you end up working against each other. To change this, take the Conditioned Response Training Challenge: 

The first step is, when talking about your horse, don’t allow any non-partnership words into your vocabulary. Once you stop saying them, you will stop thinking them. This change of thinking allows you to work together to overcome any difficulty.

Next, start concentrating on what you do want your horse to do, instead of what you don’t want your horse to do. If you make this change, you will notice that your horse will actually do less of what you don’t want him to do! Why? Because you’ve stopped trying to undo or untrain bad habits and now you are focused on improving good habits. This is called the replacement concept. So, every time you catch yourself thinking "I’ll make you stop this disobedience", replace it with "I’ll help you understand what I’m asking; I want you to succeed – I’m on your side".

As the teacher, you are responsible for teaching your horse what you want him to learn. If the horse doesn’t do what you ask, it’s your fault, not his. It is your responsibility to train your horses to respond to your cues. If the horse doesn’t respond, it’s not because he is incapable or unwilling, it is simply because you haven’t taught it to him well enough. Take a minute to think about and try to understand your student. When your horse get distracted, he is exhibiting perfectly normal horse behavior. He’s not trying to get out of anything nor is he doing it as a personal attack on you, he is simply uncomfortable with the situation. When your horse refused to walk when all the other horses on the trail ride took off at a trot or canter, your horse was not being obstinate – he was worried about being left alone and feared he might not see his buddies again. These are legitimate horse anxieties and you cannot expect your horse not have these fears or anxieties. But you can teach him to perform in spite of them. (Remember to teach – not punish!) 

When the horse responds to your signal, you both win. 
You get the performance you want, the horse gets the release from pressure 
he wants – with no tension, anxiety or confrontation. 
You communicated with each other perfectly.